no matter how optimistic i am most of the times, there is just sometimes that one true fact that you cannot escape. the world at large is so much so lacking in love but a lot more of selfishness.

if only selfishness was love also, then i think that the world could become a paradise.

well, i dun know what the F*** is with humanity at large, well, i am a human too and i do ask myself this question but it is so much so in us to judge and try to lump our standards,expectations our understanding and opinions about a certain thing or person and be so firm about it when most of the time, we are all just ignorant fools trying to decieve ourseleves that we know so much and have seen so much and therefore can say whatever we say. although i have back slided from christianity but i do remeber that there is so many parts that remind us that we should not judge others for we will be judged by the same standards when we see GOD. we are not good enough no matter our age, our academic knowlegde, our social standing, experience, wealth that will allow us to judge another. the most ugly part about it is when you make a negative judgment, share and even when you know and can tell that the person didn't quiet like or agree with you, u still go on and propagade your idea.

well, i must say that i am careless with my words at times, some of my friends would agree with me that i am more of a guy than a gal in so many aspects(except with my bf off caz) succh as my thoughts, my straightforwardnes which is to some a bluntness, the way i think and so on and so forth. an i must also say that i am the type that will go into an arguement to support my stand but very seldom is it about something that is near to judging another human. watch your tongue. GOD made humans with 2 ears and 1 mouth for us to talk less, listen more, the tongue is evil like a serpent. i am trying my best to leaern that. well, recently, i started with basic chinese medicine module and there was something that i thought was really true and would like to share.

i can only say that i am not sure but cannot conclude that it does not exist for i have not seen all possibilities of the object

think about it. don't be too fast in concluding and try to deliver your thoughts as your own and don't try to convert other people. there are so many alternatievs in the way you can look at something or someone, instead of going thru the trouble of considering it all, why not just dun judge?? unless it is vital to your survival or in terms of a business venture.

what prmpted me to post this is the comments and the way pple around me, even my close ones have on my relationship with mny bf, a young man whose academic area is not too standard by their standard of caz. well, i must say that falling in love is easy but maintaining a relationship is difficult, much less a loving relationship. although we are happy together, people's views and their treatment is much lesser then what we deserve.

that's why sometimes i don't understand why there is so much mother and daughter-in-law fauds. if both of you really love someone, both should put in effort to have a harmonious relationship for that person's sake if it is not for your own sake.

only fools will judge others as fools, real humanity people respect the dignity of others, no matter great or small

Well, it has been almost a month since the last time I blogged and I must say that there are many and a few things that I can share…about my life….what do I mean by little and many at the same time?

Well, little in the aspect that my life still revolves about school, tuition and my bf; many in the sense that a lot of things have developed in these areas lately.

Well, about 3 weeks ago was the inter-semester hols and all was going on quite well but for only one spoiler. Well, on that Friday morning, when I was still sleeping, my ho rang and it was the person who was in charge of the hostel tuition that I teach. She called just to inform me that that day itself would be my last day. Bitch! The reason given was that the girls had other plans and who in the freak would ever do something like that? You know, I was pretty nice w the kids there and everything was going on very well, and even if they want to change a tutor, I think that it was only courtesy that they tell you a few lessons before hand and not just today is yor last day thingy. Since, I have 2 assignments at the hostel, this meant that my income plunged by nearly half and I immediately went on to find new tuition jobs to try to cover the loss. With the mentality that I would take if there is and if there isn’t any assignments then I will study. Well, to day, I have started on a new sci 3 maths assignment and sec 4 maths, recovered more or less. Will be packed with tuition after the exams since I will be taking on another sec 4 student.

Thoughts on this……it is all these little things that I sometimes think that it is useless being nice to the people around you sometimes. Some bastards just don’t have that kind of courtesy to have least treat you with respect.

About school, I will just say BUSY quite a lot of things have been happening lately. Well, I remembered the quiz dates wrongly twice!! The first time, I thought that it was a week earlier then it should be and spent a large majority of my time during the hols to study for it. The other one was just that I thought that it was earlier by 1 day. Well, the quiz that I studied twice for was in itself quite simply the other one was just average.

For my batch of students onwards, electives that we take will have the same weight as you core modules. So the university did give some lee-way out, we can declare if we want to use satisfactory/unsatisfactory options which will be the words to appear in your transcript and not taken into the calculation of GPA. Well, I didn’t use the options last seem to leave it for later electives but silly me missed the date to declare. Damn…need to study for they management module that I took and it is not open book. Damn.

Looking at the amount of time left, damn…there is so much to study yet so little time.

Thought on this……….I will try my best,. The first week is the most difficult but after that it is more widely spaced out…..argh….wonder how much midnight oils I need to burn…..regret not learning “breakthrough in speed reading”…..hmmm….anyone heard of speed reading for Chinese?


Well, about my bf the issue of how to let him stay here till I go to Beijing in 2008 is troubling us lately. Then the other day, we tried to go MOMO with the NPCC gals thinking that a lot of people went but in the end there was only veronica and Linda. Then, the trouble was that all his official documents have his age backdated by 2 years and because of that, he couldn’t enter. Luckily, Linda attracted some member’s attention who in the end help us get in thru the member door with no obligations. That is the good part about getting to know the members there, they usually don’t check at all. That week was our happiest week for so long. We met on wed night; he cut his hand on thurs night so I brought him to the doc, then on fri MOMO and on Saturday, our usual overnight meeting.

Thought about this…..can’t wait to get to Beijing, there won’t be so much restrictions…can see my bf more and he will be in a more comfortable position caz he no need to work in this shitty job anymore.